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THE BILLY FINN BARBER SHOP
was located at the old site of the Peter Pan flying
machine, the Finn family kitchen. For lunch that day, Billy
had catsup on bread, and whenever he got that, he knew
food was scarce, and that it was right before payday. His
main concern was over the rationing of popsicles. Billy
had to get a job. With cardboard in hand, he walked to
Annas house, and asked her to draw a new sign on the
back of the piece of cardboard that proclaimed the now
defunct Amusement Park. Anna drew the sign, and even
put a barber pole on it. Billy was very proud as he
watched her artistic endeavors. She warned him, "now,
Billy, don't you be cuttin' anyones hair?" "It's only
pretend, Miss Anna" he replied, like a fox.
The new sign proudly hung on the fence gate. Billy Finn
was officially open for business. He had a pair of green
plastic scissors which wouldn't cut a piece of paper, let
alone a strand of hair. The kitchen door opened.
Customers!, thought Billy. It was Tommy and Freddie
Jones looking for Garrett. "He's out with my Dad", Billy
told them. "We're gettin' a car." "You wanna be my first
customer, Tommy?" asked Billy. Tommy Jones sat at the
kitchen table in one of the chromium chairs. Billy placed a
mixing bowl on his head, and gave him a trim. Tommy's
hair was longer than usual, and was, in fact, in need of a
haircut. He told Billy that on Saturday, his dad was taking
him to a real barber shop. "For five cents, I can do it for
you!" exclaimed the master barber. Tommy Jones
reached into his pocket.
Billy went over to the cupboard to find his mom's sewing
scissors, but they were not there. He did notice a candle
and matches in the far corner. This was in case of a
power failure, of which there were many. Billy was told
never to play with matches. He took the candle and lit it.
Holding the candle in one hand, and pulling Tommy's hair
with the other, he singed Tommy's hair, and thus,
invented a new way to cut hair. He burned it off. The
smell was putrid, but Billy proceeded, and after each
singe, he dabbed the newly coiffed hair with a wet towel,
lest Tommy should catch fire. Freddy refused his turn.
Billy was so proud of himself. He earned a nickel, and his
reward would be a popsicle after the train whizzed
through town. He returned the matches, and the now half
burnt candle to the cupboard just as Cathy Finn walked
through the kitchen door. "What's that I smell, Billy?"
Billy shrugged his shoulders. "And why aren't you over at
Anna's?" He shrugged again, and went out in the
backyard to play.
There was a loud knock on the front door. Very loud,
thought Cathy as she skipped to the door "just a minute,
just a minute!" When she opened the door, she gasped.
Mrs. Christine Jones was holding the hand of her son
Tommy whose head looked like it just came out of a
toaster!
"What the hell happened to him?" asked Cathy. The
incensed and trembling Mrs. Jones did not say a word.
She stared right through Cathy Finn, right through the
kitchen exterior wall.
"BILLLLLLY FINNNNNNN, I AM GOING TO
KILL YOU!", Cathy bellowed as she tore to the back
yard.
Billy got a good spanking for that, and was given the
ultimate threat. "Wait til your father gets home!" Cathy
told Mrs. Jones to have Tommy go to the barber shop
and get his head shaved, and that she would pay her on
Saturday.
At seven p.m., Ed Finn and Garrett arrived home in a
1949 Plymouth coupe. Billy was taking a bath in the
kitchen. He stood naked in a tin tub filled with water as
Cathy told Ed Finn of the barbershop. Billy saw his father
reaching for his belt buckle, and Billy knew what that
meant. The strap! Billy jumped out of the tub, dodged
everyone trying to catch him, flew out the front door, and
ran down Kidder Street, stark bare-ass naked! His
father was in chase, and gaining ground. Ed Finn began
to chuckle because of the absurdity of the haircut, and
now this little boy running naked toward the coal mine.
He caught Billy by the scruff of the neck and threw him
over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, lightly spanking
his bottom all the way home.
The sign was taken down, and the barber shop ceased
operation.
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